My Final Comments: An Epilog of Sorts

Last night was an exhaustion that was fun to try and explain to Lori and Alex. So many memories that it will be difficult to get my head around them until I go through the 1500 or so photos as I build the album for Conner and sort out items for TFA.

This entry may get a bit lengthy and it is 100% my observations and opinions of the past week. My intention is to summarize what we experienced as parents from the outside and what your sons should have taken from the inside.

Why does this “Tour” exist? What is its real purpose? I had no preconceived ideas really, beyond seeing football in another country, site seeing when possible, blogging to all of you because I thought you would like to know and follow along, and full filling my inner shutter bug. The thing is, I got so much more.

Football is religion in England, not simply one of life’s small diversions. Supporters live and die with their sides in every living minute detail. Paul Holdgate, drawing on this religion that took him into the professional ranks as a young man takes from his experiences and uses this basis for a week of teaching boys from the U.S. how the work put into becoming a quality footballer translates into many area of their life. That is to say well beyond the simple tactical and technical aspects of movement on a given pitch.

The real focus of the week is “Professional Preparation”, perhaps not at the true professional level of 5 star hotels and personal physio’s, but a the basic level our sons can learn from more readily: getting the proper amount of sleep and hydration, putting the correct fuel in their bodies for performance, and stretching. They worked on how to become mentally prepared for a match, achieving focus, having a professional appearance in their boots and kits and having a good warm-up toward playing with intensity and pride for their team mates. The final result is judged by their improvement in these areas rather than by the score that separated the sides.

It was impressive how dedicated to this charge, organized and sincere the entire experience is and all the credit goes to PH. As the experience progresses you can see first-hand how the attitude and effort levels change in many of the boys. You can quite literally see the leadership skills rise and show themselves in individual players. Some are very verbal, others use quiet voice and some bear witness through their effort on the field. Those that really get it, use a combination.

Simply put, if your son made or in the future makes this trip and you, as a parent, do not see subtle or even an obvious change in the level of respect they show for the game or a higher level of personal responsibility in their daily life-he did not get it or is unwilling to accept his charge.

The daily journal exercise is brilliant. The first night they tend to write about the trip and what they ate. This style transcends into personal thoughts, aspirations and goals achieved or missed during the week. As a real bonus, they have these journals to reflect on upon their return to the states. PH tells them that the daily journal is something a footballer keeps to record and reflect on their preparation and play in matches throughout their careers. His contains many hundreds of game experiences.

If your son is serious about his soccer and is looking for a quality life experience, DO NOT hesitate to help him begin saving now. If you are looking for a place to send a hyper active 16/17 year old in constant need of attention and self validation on a vacation, try a Disney Theme Park.

Does your son need to be a star on his team? No. Good skills on the field, a high work ethic and manners are however compulsory. The teams and players he will compete against will challenge 100% of his skill, effort, confidence, and determination.

Like I said, I could get lost in what a valuable experience this was for my own son and that is a credit to PH. It is 80% Paul, 10% Barry for the logistics and professional experiences (he played professionally as well) and 10% England. I have known Paul for several years, though after this week, perhaps more intimately than he would have liked-although the Findlay mum’s might have on word on that. You can gather a great deal about a man if you witness his interaction with those closest to him. Paul had his parents with us for several days and his older brother for a day, perfectly lovely people all. They fell seamlessly into the group and Mum Holdgate went beyond the call of duty by taking the kits home to launder one evening. In thanks, our boy’s presented her with flowers and plants for the garden at their home.

I chose to travel with my son for a selfish reason (I had never been to Europe) not because I was hesitant to let him go on his own. I learned so much about the game from eavesdropping on PH and Barry working with the boys. I laughed everyday with many new friends, I had the best “pillow talk” of my life with my room-mate Frank, and I even came to the rescue of “royalty” in distress…twice in one day, and I saw Dr. John dance. Plus I saw more historical sites and Abbeys than I can recount here. Each day we traveled with the team Headmaster as he searched for the perfect “sandy”, wear the necktie well, Jeff.

In the end it was indeed an epic adventure and rates as one of the most memorable in my life. Thank you Paul for offering the Tour and all that comes with it. I may need to start saving for a sequel.

Cheers Mate.